I probably sound like a jerk asking this, but when will you be able to send Jules home? It’s just not easy. On her, I mean. Staying here.

That’s right, true love. My beloved Vanessa is unrivaled in her mature beauty, and she actually listens to what I have to say. Unlike some people out there, she cares about what I want and isn’t consumed by some stupid, meaningless ambition. Take life as it comes, I say, and she’s totally with me on that.

I have no regrets. At all. None.

You all seem to know a ton about her and me, and you’re all real concerned about our relationship. But truth is, it hasn’t been much of one. Every time I see her, all she talks about is going home. It’s like I can’t even bring up my day without her getting ticked. I’ve been doing some thinking, and it’s like Verona’s all we ever had in common.

I like it here. For the first time in ever, I don’t have to defend my name with my life. I don’t have to go along with some dumbass fight I was born into. So why is it you guys think I shouldn’t be free to hang with someone who cares about what I have to say? I mean, I dunno how my life would be if this never happened, and it’s not like I wanted it to, but I can’t exactly pretend it didn’t. ‘Cause that’s the vibe I’m getting from you, and I want to know what’s up.

Vanessa turned out to be really chill and totally fun to talk to. She knows a ton about this land’s fashion and can go on forever about practically anyone in town. I kept being impressed by some of the things she felt comfortable going into, but that’s just me being used to Verona’s conservative women. Vanessa and I became good friends, and I can’t help but feel that she’ll be a great help once we get to know each other better.

I emailed that Unsmiler dude you guys mentioned, and this was all he said:

YOU ARE TRYING TO GET BACK. STAY IN TOUCH WITH MY AGENTS FOR INSTRUCTIONS.

Not sure why he types like that, but I guess that’s that. Not much to do about it in the meanwhile, so I’ve been checking out some of the awesome shit you guys showed me, which is way more interesting. It’s hard to fathom the amount of hilarious stuff on that tropes site, let alone the whole Internet. Makes me look back at life in Verona and wonder what I spent my time even doing.

The more I think about it, the more I wonder if these guys have the right idea here. I mean instead of their bloodline, they oppose fate by fighting for whatever the hell they want. There’s a lot of stuff like that here that just makes so much more sense when you think about it (except maybe the “arrow to the knee” thing – still don’t get that). Like the parties. They’re not nearly as extravagant as Verona’s balls, but that doesn’t make them any less fun. It just means we can have them more often without a load of preparing or dressing up. Besides, I don’t see why Verona’s women think five layers of skirts make them any more pleasing to the eye. And anyway, a learning establishment where people have time to enjoy life has got to be doing something right. Makes me almost think Verona’s stuck in the stone ages.

Speaking of Verona, I’ve been trying and trying, but I just can’t find a lead on how Jules and I could get back. If any of you out there have any ideas, I’d sure like to hear them. Really, you’d be saving my life here.

I feel much better about this whole thing knowing I’m with such chill bros. Hanging with them keeps me from getting discourag’d, and our regular events give me something to look forward to. Now that I’m a bit more used to things, I’m thinking maybe this place isn’t actually as crazy as I thought. Things sort of make sense in their own way, thee knows? But I must say, I miss Verona’s good old liquor. I’ve had occasion to try a significant amount of stuff, and none of it quite compares. Bob says the taste isn’t the point, and I guess I’ve begun to get his meaning.

O if only such windows exist’d in Verona! We would no more have need of inconstant messengers with their inconstant horses. And how much easier t’would be to erase mistaken words, without rewriting the full letter.

My good brother Robert told me this window is used to interact with other people, and never have I been so glad of being taught to read. Yet I suspect that this window must have another purpose, for I have witness’d many a dream-like image. Some seem as those of an augur’s crystal, drawn from the darkest depths of my subconscious mind. Others, I can guess not the meaning of.

Though many of the words seem written in foreign patterns, they are my key to a better understanding of this world. While I am no closer to the meaning behind the large number of cat images, I have made progress with many of the texts. Perhaps becoming learnèd in the deepest secrets of this place will open a door back whence we came.